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I decided to illustrate it in part both because I think it's cute and helps to set the stage, but also as another way of stretching myself artistically. Sketch art is fast, but can look good and is quick to do. Right now I'm shooting for one sketch per page.
As always, I promise nothing for regularity, only that this is one of many art projects I'll be working on for the time being
I'm requesting critiques for this one because I can use some help looking at the writing in different ways (unlike my art which I don't need anyone else's help to see how far I have to go).
Now, as this is the first of supposedly many chapters, it’s hard to really speak for the quality of the story as this is merely the start of it. Those unfamiliar with the writer’s character and their backstories might be confused as to who these characters are, how they fit into the world of MLP or, more importantly, why the reader should care.
But, to the writers credit, we get just enough information of the character of Rose Petal to be able to care enough about her to want to know what happens top her and here her story is going. Indeed, the same could be said of the new OC character whose been introduced in this first chapter. So on a character basis, the story also does well.
Being that this is the first time that this particular artist has taken to doing written stories as opposed to stories told in sequential art form (i.e. comics), there will, of course, be some stumbles here and there. Very little happens in this first chapter and on the whole there wasn’t anything here that I’d call “spectacular” or “eye-catching”. It is, at the end of the day, a story of an OC who finds another OC and they interact. But in defence of the writer, this is, after all, an introductory chapter, so it’s to be expected that very little will happen just yet.
In terms of originality, the idea of discovering an OC character with no memory is one that’s been used before. I’ve made one myself in fact. But as I’ve said many times now, just because a story idea has been used before doesn’t mean it’s can’t also be good in the hands of others. And this story is certainly proof of that as I found myself very interested in what was going on.
Overall this was a good, if not perfect, start to the story. There was enough in here to keep me interested in the character and curious enough to want to find out what happens next. I wish the writer good luck in producing more chapters like this and I thoroughly look forward to reading them.
One of the VERY few times you'll see Rose being (thinking?) mean.
I don't know if this has been mentioned yet, so if it has, I apologize.
Other than that, I found it amazing!
“OOF!” Again, but more insistently this time. The voice was high and a little musical; definitely belonging to a younger mare or perhaps a filly. Judging it safe, Rose head into the clearing for a better look.
The end should read, "Judging it safe, Rose headed into the clearing for a better look."
Overall well paced, beautiful use of language without burdening it with unnecessary detail. Well done! Now where's the next one....?
wuts with the PDF?
At least by that measure, this is a literary success
One of my fanfictions has this name too!
Except it's about VG Cats, notnies ^^'